Savior (An Impossible Novel) Read online

  It was a fairly lengthy cab ride from my crummy little corner of Brooklyn to Manhattan’s Lower East Side, but Clayton and I kept ourselves busy. Our lips only parted for as long as it took to pay the driver and walk across the foyer of his building to the elevator. As soon as the silver doors slid closed, he grasped me with such intensity that I fell back against the wall. His body was as unyielding as the cool metal as he pressed against me, his fingers tangling in my hair as mine curled around his shoulders. I wasn’t exactly sure when or how we made the transition from the elevator to his apartment; he commanded the full attention of all of my senses. Clayton was the only solid thing in the world as we tore our way through it, banging against walls and doorframes as we made frantic progress to his bedroom. There were long minutes where he was kissing me so thoroughly that my head was spinning from lack of oxygen. Instinct told my body to fight him, but I just clung to him more fiercely as I reveled in the resultant rush of endorphins. When he did finally give me the space to draw breath, I breathed in his heady masculine scent and became even more intoxicated by him.

  His hands were at the hem of my dress, fisting in the material as he shoved it up my body. I moaned as he began to explore my heated flesh where I desired it most, and I was desperate to touch him as well. My efforts to tug off his suit jacket proved fruitless. He was far too strong for me to manipulate his movements, and he seemed content touching me for the moment. Undeterred, I went for his belt buckle, working quickly to release the bulge that had been straining against his zipper ever since we had left the bar. I barely had a moment to fully realize his impressive size before he let out a low, guttural sound and shoved me hard. Panic shot through me at the sensation of falling, but I was barely jostled when I hit the soft mattress beneath me. The flash of fear only served to keep my adrenaline thrumming, keeping me riding high.

  Clayton had pulled a condom from a bedside drawer and was rolling it on. I was soaking wet and beyond ready for him to take me. My dress was bunched up around my waist, and he was still wearing his suit. But I didn’t care. What was passing between us now was raw and animalistic, a primal need that demanded to be met.

  He grabbed my legs and pulled me toward him roughly, positioning my body where he wanted it. When my ass was at the edge of the mattress, he settled my ankles on his shoulders and leaned forward to grip my hips with both of his hands. His eyes met mine, and I marveled at the electric blue sparks that seemed to crackle in their multifaceted depths. The light I saw there was wild and hungry, but there was still a trace of concern, of compassion, there. He was at my slick entrance, but he hesitated.

  I gripped the hands that held my waist and squeezed so his fingers dug into me almost painfully. “I want you to fuck me hard, Clayton.”

  At my throaty, brash words, that compassion in his eyes was consumed by lust, and his expression twisted into something exquisitely fierce. He shoved my panties aside and thrust into me mercilessly; the intensity of our bodies joining was almost jarring. I was no virgin, but he stretched me wide enough and fast enough that my cry of delight was tinged with pain.

  The sound made him pause. The concern was back. But I didn’t want him to be concerned, and I didn’t want him to stop. Pain and pleasure were a double-edged sword that I would happily die on a thousand times over. I pushed up my hips and ground against him in a circular motion. Bliss flared as the movement caused his cock to rub against my g-spot.

  “More,” I gasped. “Please…”

  He groaned and shifted his grip on me, splaying his fingers across my ass and hooking his thumbs over my hips. Then he pulled almost all the way out of me before driving in swiftly once again. The intensity of his thrust would have moved my entire body, but his firm hold on me ensured I stayed where he wanted me.

  “Yes!” I moaned. “Hard. Just like that. Please…”

  Whatever vestiges of concern he had left were obliterated. He took me roughly and urgently, using my body as he wished in order to find his release. It was exactly what I had craved: something so passionate and all-consuming that it claimed the entirety of my spirit.

  The head of his cock hit my g-spot over and over again, sending me skyrocketing as the ecstasy of my coming orgasm built within me. I felt his cock twitch, and I knew he was close too. Everything exploded when his thumb pressed down on my clit hard, rubbing in practiced, demanding circles as he wrung my orgasm from my body. His rough shout and my scream were a violent crescendo, a testimony to the fierceness of our shared, desperate passion.

  I moaned softly as he pulled out, leaving me feeling utterly empty. But for the first time in a long time, that feeling of emptiness wasn’t accompanied by the feeling of being suddenly, starkly alone. Clayton tumbled down on the bed beside me and wrapped his arm around my waist. Little lines of sizzling pleasure continued to slither beneath my skin as he held me against him. We were both gasping for breath in tandem, our bodies still perfectly in sync.

  When our heaving chests slowed to a more normal rhythm, Clayton rolled off of me. A cold knot twisted in the pit of my stomach. Being held by Clayton had felt nice, but it wasn’t wise to read too much into his actions.

  Wham-bam-thank you ma’am. Time to go Rose.

  I propped myself up on my elbows and started tugging down on my dress. His hands were on my shoulders, pushing me back down onto the bed. I looked up at him, confused.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” He asked.

  “Um, getting dressed?” It came out as a question. Clayton was throwing me for a loop.

  “Don’t.” It was a simple word, but it was spoken like an order. The clear, commanding tone of his voice made me shiver. My hands fell away from my dress instantly, and my legs parted slightly as I relaxed, my body instinctively offering itself to him. He cocked his head to the side, studying me for a long moment. My breaths came more quickly as he regarded me in silence, and that all-consuming need he had only just purged from me came growling back to life.

  “Stay.”

  With only that one word, I froze. Clayton left my line of sight. My eyes wanted to follow him, but I didn’t move; I hardly breathed. I could hear water running, so I guessed he was in the bathroom. Did he know what he was doing to me? Did he understand the game I thought we were playing?

  My body didn’t care if he knew what he was doing or not; it just wanted more of whatever this was. It wanted more of him.

  The sound of his approaching footsteps told me he was coming back. I thought about standing, pulling down my dress, and getting out of there ASAP. That’s what any normal person would have done. Hell, that’s what I would have done.

  But when I saw Clayton, all temptation to leave evaporated. He had gotten undressed while I wasn’t watching him. And holy fuck, was he perfect. I had been with a lot of big, brawny guys who literally put in hours every day at the gym. Clayton wasn’t bulky like them, but every part of his body was flawlessly sculpted and balanced. He didn’t have beefy arms in order to make up for the tiny calves he hid under his baggy jeans, and he didn’t have huge pecs to draw attention away from his doughy stomach. He was breathtaking.

  I was overwhelmed by the desire to touch him, to run my fingertips along the contours of him. Pushing myself up, I reached for him.

  “I thought I told you to stay,” he said sternly.

  I gasped in shock, and my body reacted before my mind could catch up. I dropped back onto the mattress, my arms falling to either side of me with my wrists facing upward, willingly exposing my physical vulnerabilities. “Sorry,” I whispered automatically.

  His grin was both pleased and predatory. “You really do like it when I’m bossy, don’t you?”

  I smiled back at him wickedly. “You don’t know the half of it.”

  “I’m sure I don’t,” he agreed easily. “But I’m a quick study.” His rough fingertips brushed against my inner thigh, and I jumped as even that slightest contact sent pleasure arcing through me. He instantly withdrew his touch, fixing me with a reprimanding star
e. He didn’t have to say it aloud again for me to know what that look meant: Stay.

  This time, it took concerted effort to force my body to relax.

  He waited before touching me again, watching my reactions as he drew out the tension. The longer he waited, the hotter I got for him. God, the man was teasing me with nothing but the sight of his body and the mere promise of his touch, and already I was close to begging him to give me what I craved. When his palms finally slid up either side of my waist, slowly peeling my dress off my body, I couldn’t hold back a strangled sigh of relief. But my torment was only just beginning.

  I shifted my arms compliantly so he could tug the dress over my head, but he suddenly stopped his steady progress. The thick, stretchy material still covered my eyes, and my arms were trapped on either side of my head.

  “Stay.” The command was a low growl at my ear, and I shuddered in delight at the sound of it. I could easily get out of this makeshift bondage if I wanted to, but I so didn’t want to. If I had thought my body was alive with need before, all of my nerve endings were positively crackling now that I could no longer see what Clayton was doing to me. He was everywhere and nowhere; his warm breath, hot tongue, and clever fingers roved over my body, but he never quite touched me where I needed it most. All of my muscles tensed until I was taut as a bowstring from the effort of staying still.

  “Are you… sure… you haven’t done this before?” I panted, my voice trembling almost as violently as my body.

  Clayton’s warmth withdrew abruptly, and a soft whine escaped me at the loss.

  “No. Why?” He asked. “Am I doing it wrong?”

  “No!” I cried desperately, yearning for his maddening caresses to resume. “God, no. Please…”

  His low, rumbling chuckle moved over and through me like a palpable thing, making me shiver. “That’s what I thought.” His tongue traced along the bottom of my earlobe before drawing it between his teeth. He bit down, and the sharp little pain contrasted beautifully with the soft flicks of his tongue. The raw, lustful sound that was pulled from my throat shocked me.

  “I told you,” he said smoothly. “I’m a quick study.”

  It probably wasn’t healthy that I found his smug tone so incredibly arousing. His cocky attitude only further inflamed my desire, and my nipples and clit were already throbbing painfully. “Please, Clayton…”

  “I like that part,” he commented as he trailed whisper-soft kisses down my neck.

  He wanted me to beg? If that was all it would take to get him to release me from this sweet torture, then I would do it gladly.

  “Please. Please touch me.”

  I gasped as he kissed the swell of my breast. He was so close, so close…

  “Say my name.”

  “Please, Clayton!”

  Some dim part of me knew that I should be alarmed at the intimacy of what was passing between us. But the entirety of the rest of my being was focused on the gathering storm inside of me.

  He grasped my breast and squeezed roughly, pinching my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. At the same time, his other hand stroked my aching clit. He swallowed my ecstatic scream as his lips came down hard on mine. His tongue plundered my mouth as I came, as though he could consume the pleasure that he had harvested from my body.

  I had only just begun to come down from my high when he ripped the dress off of me completely. The light that suddenly flooded my world seared my eyes, and I blinked hard to clear the spots that clouded my vision. Clayton’s gaze captivated me instantly. He looked… ravenous.

  “Touch me,” he ordered, his voice harsh. I clearly wasn’t the only one who had been suffering while he teased me.

  He didn’t have to tell me twice. My hands eagerly explored him, roving over the hard planes of his chest and his rippling abs, dipping lower to tug at the trail of light curls that led to his throbbing erection. He let out a low curse and tore open another condom wrapper. As soon as it was on, we tumbled back onto the bed. My legs were wrapped around his waist, inviting him in. I writhed beneath him as he entered me slowly, stretching me. The lingering soreness from our first frantic coupling only make the sensations that much more erotic. A sheen of sweat glistened on Clayton’s brow as he visibly held himself back this time.

  “Harder,” I begged. “Like before.”

  “I won’t last long that way, beautiful,” he admitted, his voice tight with strain.

  “I won’t either. Please, Clayton.”

  “Fuck!” Those words were like a trigger, and the wild beast within him was back in control. His ferocity, his raw power, when he was like this completely overwhelmed me. I gave over to mindless lust, allowing my body to clash with his instinctively. My orgasm claimed me with a violence I had never known before, and my fingernails raked down his back as I strained to hold him impossibly closer. He roared out his orgasm, throwing his head back as his cock pumped within me.

  I don’t know how long he lay atop me, still inside me, but I knew I never wanted it to end. But even when he did finally free himself from me, he still held me close. I rested my head on his chest, breathing in his enthralling scent as I fell into blissfully peaceful sleep.

  Chapter 2

  Damn, he’s hot.

  Possibly the hottest guy I’d ever hooked up with. Okay, so he was definitely the hottest guy I had ever hooked up with. Hands down.

  The sun was just coming up, and I knew it was time for me to get the hell out before he woke up. But I couldn’t resist lingering for a few minutes longer in order to drink him in, ensuring that the image of him was burned into my brain so I could revisit it again later. My greatest conquest to date.

  I frowned at myself. Something about that thought seemed wrong. Although I preferred being controlled in the bedroom, I had always enjoyed the heady sense of power that came with luring a man in. Clayton had fallen into my trap beautifully. But the swiftness with which he had turned the tables on me once I goaded out the Dominant side of him…

  No man had ever made me feel so deliciously vulnerable, so utterly possessed. And to be honest, that scared me as much as it thrilled me. For the first time in years, I was tempted to stay in the morning. I allowed myself a brief fantasy where he awoke to my touch and took me again. Maybe we could even have breakfast afterward. He had been a damn good fuck, but I found myself smiling at the memory of our banter in the bar, as brief as it had been.

  I mentally slapped myself and shook my head to clear away the fantasy.

  Stop being an idiot. You’re just some random woman he took home from the dive bar. He won’t want you hanging around in the morning.

  And I didn’t want to hang around. I didn’t. Besides, I needed to get back to Greg before I had to go to work. I prayed he hadn’t found his stash. Although I dreaded seeing him go into withdrawal, he should be okay for a little while at least. I longed to have my baby brother back, if only for a few hours while he was lucid.

  I suppressed a sigh so I wouldn’t rouse Clayton. It really was time to go. Still, I couldn’t help studying his perfection for a few moments longer. I foolishly longed for him to open his eyes so I could look into those electric blue depths that literally took my breath away.

  Time to go, Rose.

  Drawing on years of experience, I carefully got out of bed in a way that wouldn’t jostle him and moved in almost complete silence as I pulled my dress on over my head. I held my high heels in my hand so they wouldn’t click on the floor as I left.

  “Leaving so soon?”

  I jumped at the sound of his deep voice. The way it rumbled with a hungry edge made me want to shiver. I ruthlessly pushed down the urge. My eyes darted to him, and I stopped myself just in time to avoid meeting his stare. I knew if I did I would be helpless to resist him. Unfortunately, this meant that my gaze fell on the sheets where they were tented at his hips, making his impressive erection obvious. I cursed myself for licking my lips at the sight. Images of tasting his cock as he fisted my hair in his hand made my mouth water.


  With a great effort, I turned away from him.

  “I have to get to work.” It was a struggle to force my tone to come out calm and detached.

  I barely made it two steps before he was behind me, his hand snaking around my stomach and pulling me back against his broad chest. I could feel his insistent hardness against my ass, and I couldn’t help pressing back into him as heat flared between my legs.

  “It’s early. Stay.”

  It wasn’t a request, and I thrilled at the word.

  “No,” I said, hating how breathy and weak my protest sounded. “I have to go.”

  His hands were on my shoulders, spinning me around so I was facing him. I was careful not to meet his eyes. That would be a mistake.

  “Okay,” he said gently. “I’ll take you to dinner then. How about tomorrow night?”

  I hated the longing that expanded in my chest, pressing against my heart almost painfully. But I knew he didn’t mean it; he was one of those “honorable” types who would make the halfhearted effort just so he didn’t look like a dick. He was doing the obligatory song and dance.

  “Let’s not pretend this was something it wasn’t,” I said coldly. I couldn’t bear to look at him. If I did, I would see that judgmental expression, the one that had slut written all over it.

  But he clearly wanted to torment me further. He hooked a finger under my chin, forcing my head up so I had no choice but to meet his gaze. My breath caught in my throat as I saw no disdain there, only consternation. He even looked slightly affronted.

  “I told you. I don’t do one-night-stands, Mary. I want to see you again.”